Is my life on tv?

I just want to tell you, he died. You know? His friend, taiko? Well he died. Vomitted blood. Died at home.

Oh. I just saw him that weekend. You are not joking right? *I feel stupid saying that because I know mum doesn't joke about things like that but I had to be sure*

I had to deal with his things. He's an orphan. I hired people to deal with everything. He is only my son's friend. Oh... I am so tired. Can I disown my son? I really think I want to do that.

Mmm... That boy... is quite naive. Good boy. For all he is, whatever he was doing, he is really just a naive boy.

The life he was leading... His existence was on loan anyway. I wish I don't have this son. Is it my karma? I hope I get to sleep tonight. I've not slept much.

Mmm... Is the funeral over? How's my brother taking it?

Yes. 7 days ago. I've dealt with it. I arranged everything. Your brother? He's back in malaqa. He just runs away whenever anything happens and leave us to clean up after him. I took care of the boy's house and funeral. And his things.
You come home some time soon, ok? To see me. Life is brittle.

I have a short school vacation soon, I will go home then.

Alright, Tell you more when I see you. I don't trust our conversation over the phone.



I wanted to say something but nothing I can say is of that magnitude. I started a sentence but then I said,"Oh well, it is just work. Not like what you're going through anyway."

My brother once said, "Don't love old people too much, because they die too soon. And then you will be heart-broken." I think, I will like to change that. Don't love anyone too much because they just die.
Reminds me of "A Scanner Darkly"; which I couldn't finish because it is too close to home.